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sex tips for newly married couples that will keep the honeymoon phase going

 

At the end of Bridgerton season two, Anthony and his new bride Kate Sharma take hours to join the family in Pall Mall. They’re too busy having sex. As the younger, unmarried Bridgerton siblings complain about being kept waiting for six hours, Daphne, who spent a large chunk of season one really enjoying her honeymoon, simply shrugs and says: “Six is nothing when you’re a newlywed”.

When you’re a newlywed, all you’re thinking about is your next romp with your partner. If you’re living by yourselves, the world (read: every room) is your oyster. And if you’re staying with family, well… you’re married. No one’s judging.

The months following your wedding should come with some serious R&R, and a ‘do not disturb’ sign planted outside your door. For emphasis, you can always put a sock on the handle (no pun intended). As for couples who shacked up long before they said “I do”, your relationship is set to get a new lease with an addendum to amp up your bedroom play. Aka, this is your chance to get really creative.

To this end, we’ve curated a list of sex tips by sex therapists and experts for the new bride and groom to kick things off with a bang!

6 sex tips for newly married couples that will keep the honeymoon phase going

1. Let’s talk about sex, baby

The cardinal rule to good sex is: to communicate. This is true for all newlyweds, regardless of whether you’re seeing each other naked for the first time or have memorised your partner’s beauty spots by now. Talk to each other about your kinks; your deepest sexual fantasies, what you’re open to trying, and things that are a strict no. It might feel awkward at first, but you’ve got to talk the talk so you can walk the walk (so to speak).

Speaking to Bridal Guide, sex therapist and talk show host Dr. Ruth Westheimer says: “If you keep your needs and desires inside your heads, then the likelihood is that your sex life will slowly diminish in strength and intensity… But if you explain your likes and dislikes, then together you can create a very good, long-lasting sex life”.

2. A hug a day…

Hugging, kissing, and holding hands increases levels of oxytocin, a hormone that acts like a neurotransmitter in the brain and contributes to a sense of attachment. Physical (and consensual) touch is a love language by itself, so sneak in a little peck through the day or re-charge yourselves with the longest hug.

3. It’s a toy story

According to sex therapist Marrisa Nelson, sex toys can increase pleasure during sex by a hundred. Speaking to Marriage.com, she says: “Vibrators and toys are great for revving the body up and getting aroused during foreplay to use on each other, or for mutual masturbation”. She also encourages new couples to take some time to go hunting for the G-spot.

4. You don’t always need a bed

If you’ve been married for a few months and worried about falling into a monotonous routine, why not spice things up by taking it beyond the bedroom? You don’t need a bed to have great sex; in fact, things can get downright steamy in places you wouldn’t expect, like a kitchentop counter for one…

5. Energised and prioritised

In most cases, after you tie the knot, you’re around each other 24/7. To this end, there is a tendency to take sex for granted. However, this is a slippery slope, because if you stop prioritising sex right at the get-go, it may lead to resentment later. Sex therapist Ian Kerner advises couples to make sex a part of their daily schedule. For instance, taking a shower together each morning. “After all, sex can’t happen if you’re on Facebook for hours and finally collapse into bed at midnight,” he tells Bridal Guide.

6. Quality over quantity

When you’re a newlywed, you’re bound to feel this urge (and even pressure) to fornicate around the clock, and to ensure that each time brings about the ultimate pleasure. However, quality is always better than quantity. As Nelson tells Marriage.com: “Sex is a collective experience, so what’s most important is focusing on pleasure and exploration for mutual enjoyment. I see many men get discouraged by not having sex everyday, or getting down on themselves for not giving their partners orgasms every single time. Let this special time together be about intimacy and connection, which is foreplay, cuddles, eye contact, skin-to-skin, eroticism, fun and flirtation. When you have all of these elements at play, it maximises the pleasure and the great time you are having together basking in all each other’s glory.”

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